Nobody on a first date asks about money scripts. But according to Dr. Kristine Anthes, that silence is where relationships start breaking down. In this follow-up conversation with Rick Kahler, Kristine gets into the mechanics of IFS-informed matchmaking — how she prepares clients before a date, debriefs them after, and slowly brings money into the conversation through values rather than net worth. Rick shares his own story of insisting on a prenup, watching parts take over the negotiation, and ending up without one. The real insight isn’t about what someone earns or owns — it’s about psychological flexibility, whether a person’s money parts are rigid or can bend. Two people with identical net worth can still be financially incompatible. Two people with different financial pictures can thrive. What actually predicts the relationship is what’s running underneath the numbers.
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The Biggest Money Myth Ruining Your Dating Life – with Kristine Anthis, PhD
About Dr. Kristine Anthis
Dr. Kristine Anthis, PhD, is the Founder of IFS Dating & Matchmaking, where she combines the science of psychology with personalized matchmaking to help high-achieving singles build healthier, more fulfilling relationships from the very beginning.
As a Certified Matchmaker with an extensive clinical background in couples therapy, Dr. Anthis offers a level of psychological insight that goes far beyond traditional dating services. Drawing on years of experience helping individuals and couples navigate relationship challenges, she equips clients with the tools to better understand the internal patterns that influence attraction, dating, communication, and long-term partnership.
Her work is rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS), helping clients recognize and understand the different “parts” of themselves before, during, and after dating. By increasing self-awareness and emotional flexibility, she empowers singles to make relationship choices that align with their authentic values rather than unconscious patterns.
Dr. Anthis is trained through the IFS Institute in Internal Family Systems Therapy Levels 1, 2, and 3, as well as Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO) Couples Therapy. She is also trained in Nonviolent Communication (NVC), providing clients with evidence-based strategies for creating stronger emotional connections and healthier communication.
After years of helping disconnected and conflicted couples heal through IFS and IFIO Couples Therapy, Dr. Anthis began asking a different question: What if many of these struggles could be prevented before relationships even begin? That question inspired her to found IFS Dating & Matchmaking.
Today, her mission is to help people build emotionally healthy relationships from the start, reducing the long-term emotional, financial, physical, and relational costs that often accompany unhealthy partnerships. Through her unique integration of clinical psychology, matchmaking, and relationship education, Dr. Anthis helps clients develop lasting connections built on self-awareness, compatibility, and emotional resilience.
About Rick Kahler:
Rick Kahler, MSFP, CFP® , CFT™, CeFT® , Certified Internal Financial Systems™ Financial Therapy Practitioner, president of Kahler Financial Group, is a lifelong resident of Rapid City, SD. He began his professional career in 1973 selling and appraising real estate He founded Kahler Financial Group in 1981. He became the first fee-only Certified Financial Planner™ (CFP ® ) in South Dakota in 1983. In 2020 he became one of the first Certified Financial Therapist (CFT™,) in the nation.
His firm, specializes in the integration of investment advising, financial planning, financial coaching, and financial therapy, serving small business and real estate owners, professionals, and retirees, as well as individuals and families.
He served on and chaired the South Dakota Investment Council and served in leadership capacities with the Financial Planning Association and the National Association of Financial Planning Advisors. Kahler is also a nationally renowned speaker and educator. In 2003, National American University recognized Mr. Kahler with the Alumni Distinguished Service Award.
Interested in working with Rick Kahler, MSFP, CFP®, CFT™, CeFT®, Certified Internal Financial Systems™ Financial Therapy Practitioner? Please go to our website, Book a Financial Therapist Appointment and fill out a request for a 30-minute free consultation.
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